A Simple Practice for Presence
As we experience and witness escalating and far-reaching political actions that cause harm, and seek to trigger fear and divisiveness, it is ever more important to maintain individual and collective practices which remind us that love is infinitely more powerful than fear—and that when we are grounded in this truth, we can take effective action to protect life and create a new way forward.
Below is a practice that invites you to remain as present and non-reactive as possible as you face violent threats to the well-being of yourself or your community members.
The capacity to witness and allow your experience moment by moment is one aspect of Self-Empathy (the 4th Relationship Competency in MCD). It is meant to allow space for you to experience all that is alive in you with acceptance and honor.
This practice isn't meant to be an elixir that removes unpleasant experiences. Rather, it’s about increasing the capacity to be with your experience without trying to push it away or get caught up in it.
When you learn to be a "big container," it means you are allowing an experience to be there. For example, you might notice a feeling of fear and say to yourself, "Okay, I notice I am feeling fear right now. That's okay to feel. I don't have to push it away."
When you live with acceptance and honor for what is alive in you, you create inner spaciousness. When you are not in reaction to your own internal experience, you can continue to remain present and responsive to life. You are available to contribute.
One strategy for increasing spaciousness is to practice an "acceptance voice" in your daily life and meditation. Find your own short phrase that helps you move to acceptance of your internal experience. It could be as simple as noticing a feeling or thought and saying, "That's okay."
Before sitting down for meditation, explicitly set your intention to stay present. Your mind invariably wanders off and a variety of experiences arise. Each time you notice your mind wanders, name the thought, feeling, desire, etc. that is present, and then repeat your acceptance phrase and return to your point of focus (breath, sounds, sensations, whatever you have chosen).
It is even more powerful to pair your acceptance phrase with physical movement or intentional relaxing of muscles in the face or shoulders. If you continue this practice over time, you will find yourself less reactive and more resourced with whatever experiences and situations you encounter. In this way, you become able to contribute what is yours to give.
Practice
This week, choose an acceptance phrase to practice in meditation and throughout the day.
Some examples might be:
“That’s okay.”
“It makes sense to feel this way.”
“I accept my human experience.”
“I give myself permission to feel this.”
“I am bigger than my experience (or name any particular thought or feeling).”
Practice your phrase throughout each day, as well as in your meditation periods. The goal is to allow your chosen phrase to become a habitual response in daily life.