Jackal Dictionary
Part of cultivating compassion is learning to hear the feelings and needs people are expressing regardless of the words they use. This dictionary is meant to help you in that process. If you are having difficulty guessing the feelings and needs behind someone's words, you can enter the words or phrase into the Jackal Dictionary search engine. A list of possible feelings and needs will pop up for you to consider. If you don't find a phrase you are looking for, email it to us and we will add it to the dictionary.
You can't even sweep the floor right!
Feelings: furious, impatient
Needs: competence, cooperation
You better have a good explanation for this!
Feelings: alarmed, worried
Needs: understanding, serenity
You ask too many questions!
Feelings: disconnected, defensive, vulnerable
Needs: connection, acceptance, empathy, privacy
You aren't good enough to succeed, sorry.
Feelings: disappointed, dejected
Needs: competence, reassurance
You are so insensitive!
Feelings: hurt, shock, disturbed,
Needs: consideration, warmth, mutuality
You are seeking outside of yourself.
Feelings: impatience, frustration
Needs: self-reliance, independence, autonomy
You are punishing me!
Feelings: pain, hurt, anger, desperation
Needs: compassion, to be seen/heard, healing, connection, clarity
You are being so critical!
Feelings: pain, anger, hurt
Needs: understanding, recognition, compassion, connection
You are being crazy!
Feelings: frustrated, confused, angry,
Needs: peace, clarity, ease, collaboration, groundedness
You are always grumpy or upset about something!
Feelings: frustrated, disconnected, dejected, bored
Needs: celebration, play, fun, intimacy, love, humor
You always interrupt me!
Feelings: resentful, irritated
Needs: acknowledgement, respect, to be seen/heard
Why don't you love me anymore?
Feelings: confused, anxious, downhearted, despair
Needs: love, clarity, reassurance, appreciation, affection, warmth, companionship
Why don't you have a better job?
Feelings: anxious, disappointment
Needs: security, competence
Why do you always want to talk things through?
Feelings: apprehensive, tired, burnt out, resentful
Needs: safety, ease, harmony, play, connection
Why can't you listen to me?
Feelings: irritated, hurt, discouraged
Needs: to be seen and heard, expression, connection